Alone in surreal lives

I'm really self asorbed.

I usualy do not realize this until days like today, when I'm bored and for the LIFE of me I can't figure out why I"m in such a bad mood until the fleeting thought wonders into my brain like a lost puppy

"Why is everyone doing something else? Why arn't they doing things with me?"

Usualy i think this sort of thing about four hours after I ditch someone to do something 'better'. Better rarely occurs, and then I sit and feel sorry for myself for about 3 mins until the long lost puppys half brother wonders in.

"Its my own responsibility to do good things"

Then, one of the following things happens

A) I Feel very guilty and annoyed for a moment and then do homework
B) I do something very fun
C)I get very mad at everything, until Kyle bailes me out

Kyle is with Derek, my homework is upstairs, and I feel rather empty. Its only 6 however, so perhaps there is time for the future.

Christmas was lovely. My CD's lovely, my grandfather driving me nuts, good cheer and health to all.